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The Last Road Home

Rants and Rambles

Looking out over the vast oceans of rants and rambles

I keep rolling my pants legs higher and higher

The bullshit just keeps getting deeper and deeper

One lie spawns another and another

Until I am standing in shit up to my neck

What are we to believe anymore

Who can we trust

What can we trust

One told one that told another

And they all told another

And so on and so on

We are products of our screwed up environment

Manifestations of mayhem

Concoctions of chaos

Completely unaware of our original reason for existence or destination

Like ants in a small box

We inch to and fro on a small speck of dust

Like fish in a tank we move back and forth

Never content with what we have

We need more and more and more

Gotta get all we can get before somebody else gets it

The way I look at it

You are born, you live, and you die

That’s it in a nutshell

You are born, you live, and you die

You don’t need to know where you came from

 You don’t even need to know where you are

And you damn sure don’t need to know where you are going

So shut up and smell the roses

Just enjoy the moment

Learn to just be for awhile

Climb off your high horse

Put your feet on the ground and sit a spell

Reach out and touch somebody

I mean really touch them

Dip down deep into your humanity

Don’t be so afraid to touch the core of your being

Take off your blinders

Take off your false face

The self you’ve created is not who you are anyway

The person you thought you knew

You don’t know at all

Stop trying so hard

You can’t prove it

You can’t sell it and you won’t overcome it

So just disregard it

Shuck it off one piece at a time

And you will find absolutely nothing to fret about

Trapped inside my head

Where am I dear God? Have I died?

Look at her doesn’t she look so peaceful.

Yeah she’s went through a lot of pain.

Who are you? Where am I? Please tell me where I am.

I think we did the right thing bringing her here. They can take care of her needs so much better than we can.

Who are you talking to? Can’t you hear me? Why won’t you listen to me? I need to go to the bathroom. My stomach hurts. I can’t feel my left arm or leg. Please help me up.

Such a sad face Mama are you hungry.

I tried to feed her this morning and she spit it out.

I need to get up. My bowels are moving. Please help me.

What’s that smell?

Don’t look at me. You better call the nurse. I think it’s mom.

God, she’s pooping everywhere.

Please help me. Can’t you hear me? Don’t leave me here with these strange people.

Well mom we have to go. We will see you tomorrow.

She can’t hear you, poor thing. She’s out of it. Hospice will meet us here in the morning to take over the care. The doctor said she won’t get any better. Three to six months at the most.

Please in God’s holy name can’t you hear me? Don’t leave me here. I’m not going to die like this. I want to go home. Please take me home.

Look Tom her mouth is quivering almost like she is trying to say something.

Yes, the doctor said those are involuntary reflexes. She can’t even hear us.

Well the nurse is here mother. Tom and I will see you tomorrow. Bye now.

Wait, please wait. God help me.

Let’s get her cleaned up. She is going on hospice tomorrow. She looks like she might be in pain. Check the med chart and see if we can give her something to knock her out for the night.

You got it.

Oh God just let me die right now. I don’t want to be here. My family has left me here to die. Oh God I’m so cold.

Take that blanket off her. She looks hot. Let’s get out of here. We’ve got a busy night.

Out of Site Out of Mind

I am so sick and tired of hearing people say 'we need to quit sending our money and resources over seas and focus on our problems here in the US'. Let me say to this statement that it’s so much easier to help someone somewhere else than it is right here in our own back yard. It doesn't require any time, effort, deep thought, organization, or planning on the part of our citizens.

It is a feel good thing to sponsor a child who is starving in some far away third world country. It is a look how special we are deal to box up clothes and supplies and put them on a truck to some far away disaster zone. As long as we don't have to get off our ass and climb out of our easy chair and go with them.

Americans have forgotten how to work together to solve seemingly impossible problems. We can't seem to agree on much of anything except the fact that we can't agree on much of anything. We don't stand on common ground anymore. There are too many distractions, fads, scams, shams, wheeler dealers, nuts, crazies, scam artists, liars, deceptions, and just plain psychopaths everywhere and that is our so called leaders in government I am talking about.

Most folks have been beat down to the point where they just don't feel like what they do really makes any difference. Others have sold out to the idea that we are too far gone to bring about any meaningful, lasting, positive change. Still others like to gripe and complain without taking any action what so ever. I am personally almost to the point of giving up on trying to do what ever it is I think I'm trying to do to fix what ever it is I think I'm trying to fix. All this is mind boggling to me. What is the fundamental question that we need to ask ourselves? How can we possibly make any sense out of all this?

We have turned into animals eating each other up tearing each other apart. Most of you have no idea what is really going on in this country today. Most of you are clueless when it comes to realizing how serious all this really is.

It amazes me to see how some of you put all your family pictures and air all of your dirty laundry on Facebook and other social platforms. You poor ignorant, uneducated fools when will you learn? What will it take to get you to keep your mouth shut? Big brother is watching you logging every key stroke and monitoring every conversation. Why would you subject your family and loved ones to these dark and dangerous forces? All these ignorant mistakes you are making now will come back to haunt you, your children, and your families.
Do you really think for one moment people really give a damn how your family looks? What they are wearing, where they went, what they had for breakfast, or what the babies’ poop looked like this morning? Hell no. Hell no. Hell no. All of you vain air heads should be rounded up and thrown into the nearest idiot camp. Are you feeding the hungry? Are you finding shelter for the homeless families and children in your community? Are you visiting and comforting the lost, lonely, depressed, and sorrowful human beings around you? Are you working with others to bring your community together united for a common cause? One that will bring peace, prosperity, safety, security, health and well being to all.

Have you stepped out of your comfort zone long enough to feel the hurt, pain, and suffering of those in your midst? How much have you given of yourself, your money, time, effort, attention, and understanding to those critical outreach programs in your community that need your support? When is the last time you went out to visit and comfort those lost senior citizens in long term care facilities in your neighborhood? Some of them never, I said never, receive a visitor. They were just dumped there to die with strangers.

Maybe you are thinking right now who does this guy think he is to tell me what to do, how to do it, and when to do it. I’m the guy that will tell you what you need to hear and not what you want to hear. I am the guy out there busting my balls trying to figure out some solution to these massive, overwhelming problems we face and our children will be left with when we are soon to be dead, gone, and rotting in the grave.
So answer me. Tell me what you are doing. Tell me what else I can do. Tell me what we can do together. Get off your ass and do something. But first of all take all of that vein, ugly pictures off the social platforms. Get a life.

We live in a very nasty, crooked, dirty, deceitful, two faced world. The prime directive for our existence, if there is one, should be to do no harm and to try to help lift each other up out of our crummy, little, confusing state of affairs. We are all in this together. We bleed the same blood, breath the same air; have the same basic needs, wants, desires, dreams, and aspirations. We cannot escape or separate from each other no matter how hard we try.

Every one of you should devote your life to a cause. I don’t care what it is. Just figure out what you can learn and do it to the best of your ability. Let me give you some examples: senior citizen advocacy, the environment, education, social services, and critical outreach, volunteering at a soup kitchen, the homeless, government watchdog, or whatever. Find something and put everything you have into it.

Educate yourself, empower yourself, train yourself, discipline yourself, get focused, locate your target, zero in and shoot for it. This is what you are supposed to do. This is what your kids are supposed to do. This is what we are all supposed to do.

Common citizens must learn to stand together on a united front standing hand in hand. This chain will not be broken. All it takes is that first step.

You have to get used to working outside your comfort zone. You have to give up some of your creature comforts. You have to be able to put yourself in other people’s shoes. If you are not a part of the solution then you are definitely a part of the problem.

A word of advice help the smaller non-profits in your community. Keep it at the grass roots level. Stay away from the large monstrous non-profits. Be able to see, feel, smell, and taste where your money, time, and effort is going. If you can’t personally measure the results then be cautious and careful.

Most of you will click past this article and never give it a second thought. Others will hate the messenger and ignore the message. Most of you are set in your ways. You can’t see the forest for the trees. Your minds are already made up. Then you have the know it alls who can’t be told anything. However if just a handful of you get something out of this it will be worth it. Let me know if I inspired you or pissed you off. I’m happy either way. Email me at dkiler2010@aol.com or listen to me at www.blogtalkradio.com/4thandbaker.

Eyes Wide Open

What if Jesus returned today? What would he say about the condition of the majority of churches in our community? Are we unified? Are we coordinated? Are we on track? Are we doing the work the Lord wants us to do?

If you were asked to define the word 'church' what would your definition be. A body, a group, a movement, an idea, a culture, a mission, or an objective. My definition is all of the above and more. I can better define what a church isn't than what it is. Church is not infighting, gossip among members and visitors, title grabbing, the 'look what I did' syndrome, slander, 'holier than thou' attitude. It is not 'I founded this and I founded that'. It is not perfect attendance or overwhelming participation in programs and activities.

Church should be a smooth running clock. A fine tuned instrument. A drum that never misses a beat. A finely coordinated symphony. It should have infinite capacity for compassion, understanding, and forgiveness. It should never run out of energy because it is burning at its core. Each vessel within the system should burn with the desire to give testimony to what God is doing and what he will continue to do in the lives of all who put their trust in him.

We as a people must continually reassess our relationship with God. We all fall way short of being that perfect instrument. We find God in our pain, our suffering, and the roller coaster ride of the flesh. God has not and will not turn his back on us. He will not forsake us in our time of need. He will deliver us from evil. He will save us from the snare of the evil one. God's power is always available. His mercy is overflowing. His capacity to love us in our flesh is endless.

The major problem in church today is we are all trying to out do each other. We are like little kids trying to win the teacher's respect. We are like boy scouts working for a merit badge. We are in competition with each other instead of unity. Church has become a part of the worldly machine. It has become capital driven. It is all about the money 'show me the money'. It is called organized religion.

In the real sense of the word 'Church' has nothing what so ever to do with organized religion. Organized religion is a man made concept full of counterfeit deception, smoke and mirror games, and hypocrisy on a grand scale. It has been the downfall of countless ministries all over the world. What many preachers, evangelists, and teachers don't realize is that it is the quality of the group and not the quantity that makes the difference in the effectiveness of the ministry. I agree with many preachers that I have talked to that say they had rather have ten seasoned bible believing God fearing people on Sunday morning than one hundred that are clueless as to the church's mission and calling.

You have to be careful when you decide to grow the church. Everyone needs to be ready to take on the world so to speak. The main body of believers has to be in agreement and of one accord as to the benefits and liabilities of such an endeavor.

Something that has always astounded me are the countless denominations that make up the Christian church. Each one of these groups seem to have figured out a way to alter the gospel just enough to fit into the way they think the whole thing should work. Some are even 'my way or the highway' churches. Some will ostracize you if you were far from what they think is perfect . Some are so puffed up and self fulfilled that I don't think they would know Jesus is they saw him standing on the corner.

How many people or should I say professing Christians really know the nature of God or have a real tangible sense of connection with him. God is not like a magic genie in a bottle who you can call on and make wishes when things aren't going your way. God is an all inclusive, omnipotent power that is like a mighty flowing river. Its course cannot and will not be altered or manipulated in any way or by anyone.

In order to make the full connection with God first you have to turn the power over to him. You have to let go of the steering wheel. Then move over and let him do the driving. That doesn't mean you have to give up your intellect, reason, or judgment as some think. Christians are not robots or puppets on a string. They are free moral agents created by God. We have freedom of choice. We have the power to choose right from wrong. We can do good or bad.

It is completely up to you and you alone. You are stuck with you. Good, bad, or indifferent. The only thing that separates humans from animals is self awareness or the ability to know thyself. It is a scary thought to be able to think to be able to think about thinking. To contemplate who we are, where we are, and what we are. It is an awesome concept and to me completely incomprehensible. Yet here I am able to talk about it, think about it, and write about it.

God is awesome. Existence and consciousness make my head spin. Go figure.

Amazing Disgrace

Broken, stripped, ravaged, enraged

We stand at the end of the line

Waiting for the crumbs of corporate greed

To fall down upon us

Sold out to the man, the machine

The ruling class faceless monster

With arms that reach around the globe

Devouring, subjugating, raping the land

And all that stands upon it

Masters of control

Demons of deceit

Wolves in sheep’s clothing

They come to destroy the independent man

With no soul and no body to imprison

They come like dense fog on a cold rainy night

They come without regard for life or limb

They come to own the very air we breathe

Our common lands bought and paid for

In blood, sweat, tears, pain, and death

They have intercourse with devils

To own and control the very strand of life

Of every species of the planet

They have the power to buy and sell the rain

To own the water that lays upon the ground

Beneath our feet

Like slithering worms in dark, dingy, deep mud

We the wage earner

Blind, ignorant, and hungry for more

We bow down and worship the machine

Like crazed animals in some cage of ecstasy and orgy

We feed at the trough of disgust

Our bodies run cold with these mindless manifestations

Synthetic sluts we have become

Pill crazed consuming maggots

Left to die and rot with the aftermath

Of this massive gangbang

Duped into believing we are free

Content with our stipend

Terrified at thought of revolt

We walk blindly into the light of darkness

We squirm and quiver in our comfort zones

We have submitted ourselves to these false gods

These ruling class pimps

We are whores ready and waiting

To be completely consumed and controlled

Who will come after us

What will they say of these unspeakable perversions

The prophet speaks

The black horse has arrived

The artist cries out

The poet mourns

The ground is getting closer

We are in free fall

Prepare to die

I hope on your feet fighting

And not on your knees in submission

© Kiler Davenport 2010